I spent the first half of this year complaining bitterly about the cold . It ’ s the worst winter ever ! It ’ s the coldest spring I ’ ve ever seen here ! It ’ s 60 degrees in May , it ’ s cloudy and rainy , I can hardly get out of bed , where is my beautiful sun ?

Yesterday ( June 8 ) it hit 117 in several places around the Trans-Pecos . I stand corrected .

The thing about happy mediums is , they ’ re difficult to recognize when they happen . We all claim to want them , a rare balance in a universe ruled by entropy and chaos . But how does one know when they occur ? I have too much work ; I don ’ t have enough work . What exactly is the fulcrum point between the two , and does it change with the metric I use to measure the “ happy ” part in the “ medium ?”

As I get older I begin to recognize that these things are only measurable in their aftermath . I can only look back at a time and label it ‘ good ’ or ‘ bad ’ by comparing it to what came before , and after . Much of this has to do with how my perspectives change over time , and how I learn little by little that what ’ s awful in the now is excellent in the future . I find this disappointing . Will I pass through the pinnacle of my life completely unaware that nothing so fine will ever happen to me again ? What if I miss it ? What if I ’ m distracted by something inconsequential , or irritated by a fleeting inconvenience ? What if I just miscategorize it , and I never even realize that some mundane circumstance was in fact the very best thing that ever happened to me ?

Worse still , can the final tally only be counted at the very end of everything ? What if I ’ m snuffed out in an instant by an Acme safe full of bricks like in an old Warner Brothers ’ cartoon , and I don ’ t get to see my life flash before my eyes ? The prospect of being unable to review all the days and finally understand where they fall in the spectrum of good and bad is disturbing to me . I feel a need to gain the wisdom that comes from moving something from the bad column to the good one . The prospect of living the rest of my adulthood aware of this ambiguity , and unable to do anything about it , gives me a kind of existential anxiety .

So , I ’ ve decided not to complain about the weather anymore . Is it 115 in the shade and the UV is up around 11 ? Awesome day to mop the floors in the air conditioning . A foot of snow and no electricity ? Glad I have propane , and that the kids get to go sledding . I recognize that this resolution will last exactly as long as it takes to get to another bad weather day . But it ’ s a small measure of comfort , and a tiny illusion of control , as we all forge ahead into the uncertain future . Stay cool out there .

A few corrections from last issue : in Katherine Hess ’ s piece , the Hess family sold their portion of the ranch to their cousin Gordon Buescher in 1993 . And Paul and Katherine Hess bought the Aguilar House , not the Garcia House , in 2017 . In Poetry , we mislabeled “ For Love of the Prairie Place ” as being authored by Jerri Garza . It should have been credited to her mother , Elizabeth R . Goettle .

ON THE COVER :

Davis Mountains with Blooming Yuccas - Jean Northington

Fort Davis photographer , Jean Northington , has been honing her photography skills for over 40 years . A world traveler & outdoor adventurer , she has a passion for photographing nature and wildlife in the most spectacular locations on the planet . Her quest for photographing wildlife has led her to swim with whale sharks off the north coast of Australia , trek an Indonesian jungle to photograph tarsiers and macaque monkeys , scuba dive with manta rays in Raja Ampat and encounter pandas in the bamboo jungles near Chengdu . At home in Fort Davis , her photography is inspired by rich colors of the desert and the many creatures who live there . Many of her landscape images are 3-5 images that are combined to create High Dynamic Range ( HDR ) photos . She also digitally enhances some of her photographs with color and brushstrokes to create unique designs . Jean says if someone asks , “ Is this a photo or a painting ?” she knows she has accomplished her goal . Her work is available online at www . bigbendvistas . com and locally at The V6 Collection at the Gage Hotel , Gallery on The Square in Alpine and The Paisano Hotel gift shop in Marfa .

PUBLISHER Riley Stephens publisher @ cenizojournal . com

ASSOCIATE EDITOR Shawna Graves shawna @ cenizojournal . com

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EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Danielle Gallo editor @ cenizojournal . com

DESIGN / PRODUCTION Ceci Marquez

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Cenizo Journal is published four times per year . © 2021 Cenizo Journal . Copyright of all art and images contained within are retained by the image owner and are used with permission .

Cenizo Summer 2021